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Wedding drama: Man uses flashcards to tell brother his toddler isn’t welcome, family chaos ensues

Source image: https://www.foxnews.com/lifestyle/wedding-drama-man-flashcards-brother-toddler-welcome-family-chaos

The Reddit community is supporting a man who said he made flashcards to inform his brother that his young child was not invited to his wedding. 

Redditor “throwaway3373123” asked others in the subreddit “Am I the A*****e” (AITA) on Monday, Nov. 28, for their opinions about how he dealt with his brother and sister-in-law’s repeated requests to bring their three-year-old to his child-free wedding. 

The man — in a post titled “AITA for using flash cards to explain to my brother and his wife why they can’t bring their rainbow baby to my wedding?” — explained he and his fiancée have chosen to have a child-free wedding “to keep it more organized and contained.”  

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His brother and sister-in-law, however, did not take kindly to this decision, insisting that their three-year-old son be invited, he said.

The nephew was born to the couple after a long period of infertility, wrote throwaway3373123 — noting that “everyone calls [the little boy] a ‘miracle’ or ‘rainbow’ baby.” 

Two brothers are at odds after one used flashcards to stress to the other that his young child was not invited to an upcoming wedding, according to a post on Reddit. The man who's getting married asked the Reddit community for input on the ongoing dispute between the two men (not pictured).

Two brothers are at odds after one used flashcards to stress to the other that his young child was not invited to an upcoming wedding, according to a post on Reddit. The man who’s getting married asked the Reddit community for input on the ongoing dispute between the two men (not pictured).
(iStock)

A “rainbow baby” is a baby born after a miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss, according to parenting website Parents.com. 

“When they found out that my nephew was included in the no-children rule, they tried to convince me to make an exception for him,” said throwaway3373123. 

“Even the best behaved child can require extra time and attention that can change the experience.” 

The man said his brother even tried to insist that “his son is a miracle baby and his presence at the wedding will bring ‘blessings’ for me and my fiancée,” said the Reddit poster.

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Throwaway3373123 also wrote on Reddit about the situation, “My brother told me this [wedding decision] might cause a rift in our relationship. I again said ‘no’ and explained that the wedding is child-free.”

The Redditor's brother tried to insist that

The Redditor’s brother tried to insist that “his son is a miracle baby and his presence at the wedding will bring ‘blessings’ for me and my fiancée,” the original poster said — even after he made his wedding plans clear.
(iStock)

“He asked again and pointed out how his baby is different since he’s a rainbow, a miracle baby. I again said ‘no’ and explained that the wedding is child-free.”

Throwaway3373123 then said that he knew the topic would come up again when his brother and sister-in-law came to his house — so he prepared flashcards to emphasize the point that children were simply not invited to his wedding. 

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“They brought it up when they visited my home, and I knew they weren’t going to stop,” he wrote. 

He pulled the flashcards out and started slowly showing them one by one in this order, he said:

1. The wedding (with a sticker of bride and groom)

2. Is Child (with a sticker of a baby)

3. FREEE (with a sticker of a “no entry” emoji)

4. PERIOD (with a huge, black dot sticker)

People should respect the wishes of a bride and groom when it comes to guests or details of their wedding, Pittsburgh psychologist Natalie Bernstein told Fox News Digital. 

People should respect the wishes of a bride and groom when it comes to guests or details of their wedding, Pittsburgh psychologist Natalie Bernstein told Fox News Digital. 
(AP Photo/The News & Observer, Robert Willett)

His brother and sister-in-law “both were stunned” and left his house, he said. 

His brother “said that I disrespected him, his wife and their son, who’s my one and only nephew,” the Reddit poster also shared on the social media platform. 

His wife-to-be “saw the whole thing and thought that it was funny,” said throwaway3373123 — but added that his parents and brother are “livid beyond measure” and are calling on him to “fix” the situation. 

“As long as you are clear and consistent, your decision should be respected.”

Psychologist Natalie Bernstein of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, said in an interview with Fox News Digital that she supported the couple’s decision to opt for a child-free wedding.

“Choosing to not invite children to the wedding is not a personal attack on a particular child — it is simply a preference for the tone and flow of the evening,” said Bernstein.

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“Even the best behaved child can require extra time and attention that can change the experience.” 

The original Reddit poster (not pictured) drove home his child-free wedding wishes with flashcards after his brother refused to accept the situation, the man wrote on Reddit.

The original Reddit poster (not pictured) drove home his child-free wedding wishes with flashcards after his brother refused to accept the situation, the man wrote on Reddit.
(iStock)

Bernstein has had “several” patients express regret that they allowed children to come to their weddings, she said, after their relatives pressured them about it. 

“As long as you are clear and consistent, your decision should be respected,” said Bernstein. “To make an exception for one child is unfair to the other guests.”

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On the AITA subreddit, Redditors can reply to posts saying that the poster is “NTA” (“Not the A*****e), “YTA” (“You’re the A*****e”), “NAH” (“No A*****e Here”) or “ESH” (“Everyone Sucks Here”). Users can “upvote” responses they think are helpful and “downvote” ones that are not.

Other people voiced concerns about the young nephew — saying he was being set up for trouble later in life.

The majority of Reddit users were supportive of both throwaway3373123’s decision to have a child-free wedding and his unique approach of using flash cards to drive the point home to his brother.

“Well, I suppose you could have used hand puppets instead, but flashcards seem to have gotten the message across,” wrote user Dipping_My_Toes in the top-upvoted reply. 

"Choosing to not invite children to the wedding is not a personal attack on a particular child — it is simply a preference for the tone and flow of the evening," said Dr. Natalie Bernstein about the issue shared on Reddit.

“Choosing to not invite children to the wedding is not a personal attack on a particular child — it is simply a preference for the tone and flow of the evening,” said Dr. Natalie Bernstein about the issue shared on Reddit.
(iStock)

“It makes me insane how some parents think their little bundle of joy should be allowed anywhere,” the user also wrote. “It’s pretty clear they were going to run this horse right up to the altar.”

Another Redditor, a parent of a rainbow baby, also supported the decision to not invite the young nephew.

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“I have a rainbow baby. That has s—t to do with someone else’s wedding. Your brother is nuts. NTA,” wrote user Can_You_See_Me_Now. 

Other people voiced concerns about the young nephew, saying the couple’s parenting of him was potentially setting the boy up for trouble later in life.

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“They are raising that kid to think he’s God’s gift to earth,” wrote user randaljams. 

“He’s gonna be so narcissistic as an adult.”

Source: https://www.foxnews.com/lifestyle/wedding-drama-man-flashcards-brother-toddler-welcome-family-chaos

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Underage drinking dangers: These are the states with the highest rates of teen alcohol use, study finds

A new study done by addiction recovery resource Addiction Treatment Magazine has revealed the states that have the highest and lowest prevalence of underage drinking.

Researchers looked at the number of young people between the ages of 12 and 20 who had consumed an alcoholic drink within the last month and had participated in binge-drinking, which is classified as consuming four or more drinks in one sitting, according to a press release on the publication’s website.

The data was drawn from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) based on the 2021 National Survey on Drug Use and Health.

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The study determined that the state of Vermont has the highest prevalence of drinkers between the ages of 12 and 20 in the U.S., according to the release.

Nearly 25% of minors in the state had consumed alcohol, and more than 14% had participated in binge-drinking. 

Teens drinking

A new study has revealed the states in the nation that have the highest and lowest prevalence of underage drinking. (iStock)

Other states with high rates include Rhode Island, New Hampshire and Massachusetts.  

In Rhode Island, nearly 22% of young people between the ages 12 and 20 consume alcohol monthly, and 12% of minors consume four or more alcoholic drinks in one sitting, the study found.

In New Hampshire, 20.6% of people between the ages 12 and 20 had consumed alcohol in the last month. 

The share was 20.4% for Massachusetts. 

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Rounding out the top 10 are the states of Oregon, Iowa, Wisconsin, Colorado, Maine and North Dakota.

At the other end of the spectrum, Mississippi has the lowest prevalence of underage drinking, with only 9.7% of underage people consuming alcohol. 

It also has the lowest binge-drinking rate, at only 5.4%, according to the study. 

College drinking

One possible reason that Vermont has topped the list is that it is a rural state with many colleges and universities — the highest number per capita of any state — said a clinical director of addiction services.  (iStock)

Utah is the second-lowest, at 11% for alcohol consumption and 6.8% for binge-drinking among the underage population. 

Coming in at third lowest is North Carolina, where 11.3% of underage people consumed alcohol in the last month.

Alabama is also on the lower end at 12%, followed by Arkansas at 12.3%.

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Rounding out the lower 10 are Indiana, Georgia, Idaho, Tennessee and Texas. 

“It’s no secret that underage drinking is a major concern in the United States, as it can pose several significant risks to the well-being of young people, including health risks, impaired judgment and the risk of dependency and addiction,” said a spokesperson for Addiction Treatment Magazine in the release.

Teens drinking

Overall, the findings indicate that the use of alcohol in young people continues to be a concern, said Tuell of the Lindner Center of HOPE in Ohio. (iStock)

“These findings provide an intriguing insight into where underage drinking is the most prominent throughout the country, with Vermont coming out on top. While progress has been made in reducing underage drinking rates, it is still a matter of concern, and ongoing efforts are necessary to address this issue and protect the health and safety of young people,” the spokesperson continued.

Dr. Chris Tuell, clinical director of addiction services for the Lindner Center of HOPE in Ohio, was not involved in the study, but said he wasn’t surprised by the findings.

“A parent’s position on underage drinking is paramount and is one of the strongest protective factors against underage drinking.”

“The Northeast has had a history of higher rates of underage drinking for the past 20 years,” he told Fox News Digital in an interview. “There continues to be no definitive reason why these rates are the way they are.”

One possible reason for Vermont’s topping the list, he said, is that it is a rural state with many colleges and universities — the highest number per capita of any state.

young people drinking beer outside

“The research is crystal-clear that early alcohol use before the age of 15 raises the risk of lifelong problems of addiction and alcoholism,” warned Dr. Chris Tuell, clinical director of addiction services for the Lindner Center of HOPE in Ohio.  (iStock)

Overall, the findings indicate that the use of alcohol in young people continues to be a concern, Tuell said.

“The research is crystal-clear that early alcohol use before the age of 15 raises the risk of lifelong problems of addiction and alcoholism,” he warned. 

“Early alcohol use — drinking at age 14 or earlier — [means a] 7 times greater risk for developing an alcohol problem than someone who begins drinking at age 21.” 

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Other possible reasons for the high rates in some states may be related to how the packaging of alcohol is geared toward youth, such as flavored drinks, and the association of alcohol use with sporting events, the expert noted.

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“This promotes alcohol use in young people as a necessary part of having fun,” Tuell said.

“A parent’s position on underage drinking is paramount and is one of the strongest protective factors against underage drinking,” he also said.

For more Health articles, visit www.foxnews.com/health.

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Coffee quiz! How much do you know about the can’t-live-without-it drink?

National Coffee Day is September 29 — and millions of people have recognized the special occasion. 

But no matter what day it is or what season of the year, how well do you know the popular drink that many people consume all year long? 

Test your knowledge in this fun and engaging lifestyle quiz all about coffee!

Mobile app users: Click here to play the quiz!

Have you taken our fall quiz yet? Click here to play it!

To take even more quizzes from Fox News Digital, click on this link.

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Best buys: 5 affordable wine picks from experts as fall gets underway

There’s a sudden chill in the air as autumn has arrived. 

And as the weather changes, you may be thinking about shifting your wine selections from summer to fall picks when you host friends and family in the autumn season. 

To lend a hand in those pursuits, wine experts from across the country shared with Fox News Digital their recommendations for wines under $50 a bottle for the new season. 

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Here’s to grape expectations!

2021 Educated Guess Napa County Cabernet Sauvignon, $30

This wine from Napa, California, is consistently picked by wine publications as a best buy and best in class by major wine publications.

That’s according to Amber Carner, tasting room supervisor of River Runs Deep Winery in downtown Napa.

woman drinking glass of wine

“I would pair this beautiful wine with a grilled ribeye steak with green chimichurri, roasted garlic mashed Yukon potatoes and grilled veggies with herbed butter,” said Amber Carner (not pictured), tasting room supervisor of River Runs Deep Winery in downtown Napa, California.  (iStock)

“Since our inception in 2005, we have been producing Educated Guess Cabernet Sauvignon as an answer to Napa Cabs that are two, three or four times its price,” Carner revealed to Fox News Digital. 

She added, “I would pair this beautiful wine with a grilled ribeye steak with green chimichurri, roasted garlic mashed Yukon potatoes and grilled veggies with herbed butter.”

2022 Sauvage Spectrum Teroldego from Grand Valley, Colorado, $32

Zachary Lewison, beverage manager and sommelier at Sonnenalp Hotel in Vail, Colorado, said this wine is “an excellent and affordable wine, and great for embracing the fall season.”

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Lewison added, “As the weather cools off, we start cooking heartier dishes with potatoes, squashes and heavier proteins.” 

Grocery store displays different colors and varieties of potatoes for people to select.

Said Lewison of Vail, Colorado, “As the weather cools off, we start cooking heartier dishes with potatoes, squashes and heavier proteins.” Shown above, an array of potatoes.  (iStock)

So “this wine pairs great with those flavors, as it has notes of blackberry and dark cherry, and has a slightly spiced backbone.” 

2020 Blaufränkisch, Beneduce Vineyards in Pittstown, New Jersey, $42

As the fall weather settles in, Mike Beneduce, vineyard manager and winemaker of Beneduce Vineyards in Pittstown, New Jersey, recommended his vineyard’s signature red wine, Blaufränkisch. 

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“It’s a savory, medium-bodied red with aromas of wild blueberry, bonfire smoke and dark chocolate that pairs really well with hearty stews and soups, as well as with slow roasted meat and game,” Beneduce told Fox News Digital.

For people who are stuck in a rut of drinking the same wines over and over, this wine can offer a really different sensory experience, he said. 

wine

“It’s a savory, medium-bodied red with aromas of wild blueberry, bonfire smoke and dark chocolate that pairs really well with hearty stews and soups, as well as with slow roasted meat and game,” Beneduce of Beneduce Vineyards in Pittsdown, New Jersey, told Fox News Digital, about his 2020 Blaufränkisch.  (iStock)

“It’s made from sustainably grown grapes entirely from our own farm here in Pittstown,” he said.

“It’s offered in limited quantities to customers visiting our tasting room, online shop and members of our Moonlighter’s Wine Club,” he also noted.

2020 Teroldego, South Shore Wine Company in the Lake Erie AVA, Pennsylvania, $27

Blaine Ballard, brand ambassador of Robert Mazza, Inc.’s Mazza Wineries, said this red variety is a great wine for a hearty fall dinner.  

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“This wine is full of bright fruit balanced by a vibrant acidity,” Ballard said.

“A bit of earthiness and black pepper rounds out the palate,” she added.

Family has a discussion at the dinner table

Wine experts from across the country shared recommendations for wines under $50 a bottle for the new fall season.  (iStock)

“A careful oak aging approach rounds out the wine, resulting in a wonderful depth of character sure to complement a wide variety of fall dishes. Hearty Osso Bucco or rustic poultry dishes would pair well with this wine,” Ballard also noted.

2017 Krupp Brothers Just Dessert wine, Napa, California, $45

This “Just Dessert” wine is made from Sauvignon Blanc and Viognier grapes, making it the perfect dessert wine to share at the end of a fall meal, said Tyler Hinsley, tasting room manager with Krupp Brothers, in downtown Napa, California. 

“This is a wine that I’ll choose to have at the dinner table for making more holiday memories this year.”

“Pour yourself a small, chilled glass of this wine alongside a warm pecan pie, a créme brûlée, peach cobbler, lemon cheesecake or Grandma’s snickerdoodle cookies,” Hinsley told Fox News Digital. 

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“It is worth each sip, especially when you see the smiles of your friends and family when you share this wine and pair it with a delicious dessert.”

He also said, “This is a wine that I’ll choose to have at the dinner table for making more holiday memories this year.”

For more Lifestyle articles, visit www.foxnews.com/lifestyle.

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